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It was exactly a year ago that my time at Pulpit Rock Church came to an end.  I still remember how I was feeling a year ago. Everything around us was changing.  I came back from a mission trip with the youth group and quickly moved out of our house and started the process of fundraising for Adullam.  We hadn’t gotten our referral for Kaleb yet, and we moved in with Lori’s mom for a few months before making the move to Denver.

It’s a year later, and I just got back from another mission trip to Louisiana. I need to pick a different time of year to go down there!  Anyway, I can’t believe how time flies.  I try to keep a journal, and honestly I’m not as consistent as I’d like. It’s interesting though to read the things that I was processing this time last year.  I’ve mentioned this before, but ideals are so much fun to dream about, and so much harder to live out.  We’ve almost completed our first year with Adullam, and we’ve learned a lot.

I’ve learned that this is hard.  I’ve learned that being uncomfortable isn’t as much fun as I thought it’d be.  I’ve learned that my family needed so much more of me than I was giving them.  I’ve learned that moving in a new direction is not something most people are comfortable with.  I’ve learned that God is at work despite all that we do in our own efforts to stop him.  He doesn’t need our ideas, he wants our hearts.  I’ve learned that adopting a child isn’t easy, and that being adopted isn’t easy.  I’ve learned that becoming an insider in a community takes time and trust, and most of us in the church are outsiders in the world God has asked us to reach.  I’ve also learned that escaping Christian subculture is incredibly hard to do.

I’ve found that I am ugly inside, and can’t accomplish anything without Jesus.  I’ve found myself trying to run away, run back to what’s familiar.  I’ve found that who and what we left behind is doing just fine without us.  I’ve found that my boys are incredibly adaptive, and I can learn so much from them.  I’ve found myself suffering the loss of close friends, and rejoicing in new ones.  I’ve found a completely different culture less than an hour away from where I’ve spent my whole life.

I know that God is still God.  I know that no matter what I do, he loves me.  I know that I can trust him with my family and friends.  I know that he is deeply in love with his bride, the church.  I know that he desires his church to be more than a collection of people keeping it to themselves. I know that every believer is called to be a part of seeing that happen. I know that someday every man woman and child will call his name.  I know that I will chase after him all the days of my life.

Thank you for being a part of this journey with us.  I’ll post about our recent trip to New Orleans soon.  Love you all…

This isn’t the longest summer I’ve ever had, but for some reason it seems that way right now.  A friend of mine is spending three months in Mozambique. He sends email updates every few days, and they are titled “The Longest Summer.”  I thought it was an appropriate way to describe what he is doing.  He and his wife are digging wells for those that have no clean water, and spending time ministering to orphans.  Instead of retiring to a golf course somewhere, they are serving the Lord halfway across the world.  It’s so inspiring!

Clark (who’s in Mozambique) came with me a few years ago to New Orleans.  It was our second trip with Pulpit Rock down to the Big Easy to try and help with the Katrina devastation. In a few weeks we are heading down there again.  Sitting at my desk this morning I looked up and saw Steve Glisan’s obituary.  I’m not being dramatic when I say it brings tears to my eyes every time.  Steve and his daughter came with us on that trip to New Orleans.  I keep Steve’s obit at my desk to remember to pray for his family, and to remember all that can be learned from Steve’s life.  I wrote a blog about him back in February if you’d like to read it.

I guess I have a hard time reconciling all the change that we experience in life.  People come in and out of our lives, and it’s hard to understand what our role in their life is.  Or, maybe it’s that we don’t accept our role more than we don’t understand it.  God is bringing new people into our lives to invest in and walk with, but it hasn’t come without it’s price. It’s been hard to let go of some the relationships of the past during the last eight or nine months.  It’s been a great lesson though in entrusting people into God’s care.  I mean, isn’t that what we’re supposed to do anyway?

Life tends to slow down a bit in the summer, and it’s a good time to reflect on life.  Things are still moving along for us up here, but summers seem to just slow everything down.  One thing that I’ve noticed that as when Lori and I started to pursue Christ in a different direction, we ended up losing friends.  I’m not trying to present us as better than anyone else, it’s just that living life uncomfortably isn’t something many people are interested in doing.  Comfort is the thing that is most often pursued, and when you try to stop pursuing it your eyes begin to be opened.  It’s easy to sit around and have and idealistic outlook on life, it’s another to actually step out and do it.  People like Clark step out and do it.  There is no stage to display their faithfulness.  Once again, isn’t that the way it’s supposed to be?

Granted we can’t all pick up and move our families to Mozambique (I’m proud I spelled that right by the way!), but we can choose to live out God’s Kingdom on this earth.  I was walking in downtown Denver last night with Lori and I heard these two men talking behind me.  They were part of this group from a church in Denver that was doing some sort of outreach downtown. They were all wearing the same T-shirt, and it was painfully obvious they were from a church. Anyway, I overheard them talking about how many great sermon illustrations they were getting from whatever it was they were doing downtown.  This kind of thing nauseates me.  Don’t get me wrong, I love a good sermon.  I’m just wondering when we will realize that great sermons aren’t going to save the world.  Great music isn’t going to save the world.  Jesus is going to save the world, and he wants us to bring his presence into peoples lives wether it’s across the street or in Africa.

Please don’t hear what I’m not saying.  I don’t have this thing figured out.  What it looks like for me is very different than what it will look like for you.  My question though is; are you asking God what it looks like for you?  In every moment? Wherever you are?

We are going to New Orleans July 23rd.  I’m so excited that the family is coming with me this time, including my parents! We are joining a friend of mine that is taking about 90 people down.  We are bringing a family with us that we met through the adoption network up here in Denver.  We’ve known them for a few years now.  They don’t have much church background, and we’re starting to have some interesting conversations.  We are trying to show Jesus to them, Please pray for us as we head down there…

There are a lot of other relationships that we need prayer for as well.  Here’s kind of a random one…Over the past few years God has placed friendships in my life with men who are gay.  I have no idea why.  I didn’t grow up around gay people at all, in fact I was homophobic in my earlier years.  The last year and a half in the Springs I spent time every week with a homeless friend of mine and his partner.  God has brought another guy and his partner into my life here in Denver.  They’ve been coming to a few of our social gathering activities.  This still feels like new territory for me.  I know that my role is not to try to “convict them of their sin,” but to point them to Jesus.  I don’t think the church for the most part has figured out how to love the gay community.  They are either rejected, or told that their lifestyle is okay.  How do we love them?

I don’t know the answer, all I know is that I want to show my new friends the love of Christ, and let the HS change them. Please join me in prayer as we pursue a friendship with them…

What?  Chick-Fil-A and drunk neighbors?  It pretty accurately describes my weekend.  Oh yeah, and it was Fathers day too. Happy late Fathers day to all you dads out there!  Anyway, it was an interesting weekend.  I spent Friday night at our monthly neighborhood mens night out.  It’s more like a Frat party with 40 something year olds but we call it mens night out.  I have to be honest, when I volunteered to start organizing it I didn’t realize what I was getting in to.  As you know, Lori and I are up here to build community and introduce people to Jesus that don’t know him.  I know what your’e thinking…”Hard to lead someone to Jesus at a frat party with old dudes.”  Well, you’re right.  I’m just trying to do my best to get to know these guys, and build some trust with them.  Oh, and I played music at Chick-Fil-A for two hours on Saturday night and earned 30 free meal coupons!  At least I didn’t have to sleep outside this time!

Someone I look up to has been telling me for years that as individuals and especially men, we tend compartmentalize our lives.  As Christians we struggle to let God be the God of our whole lives, not just certain compartments that we’re content offering to him.  Truth is, there should be no compartments in our lives.  We should break down all the walls, and let God rule in every area of who we are.  This lends itself to being the same person no matter where we are or what we do.  This goes to a whole new level when dealing with someone that has no faith at all.  I saw a perfect example of this over the past weekend.

I left men’s night out at 10:30, and they ended up going until 1:00 in the morning.  As I sat and listened to the conversations that I heard around me, I noticed a theme.  Most of the guys aren’t really sure what they stand for.  I see guys that apart from mens night out, want to be good fathers.  In fact, some of them put their family above everything else.  I hear about desires for social justice, protecting mother earth, and eating a healthy diet.  When they go out with the guys though, this all changes.  I can’t even repeat what happens in the conversation, but I’m sure you can imagine.

I kept asking myself; “what do these guys stand for?”  To see a father that is raising a little girl ogle at some women at the restaurant who’s half his age is crazy.  It makes him a walking contradiction.  It’s okay for him to lust after someone else’s daughter but not okay for someone to lust after his? Also, for those guys that are raising boys…What kind of man do you want your son to be?  Our kids do what they see us do, not what we tell them to.

My dad told me a story this weekend…He remembers when he was 10 years old or so and spent the day with my grandfather on a new job.  My grandpa had just lost his job and was trying to catch on with a guy doing some construction work.  As they drove around town that day my grandpa was using horrible language, and commenting on every attractive girl he saw.  My dad said it was the first time he saw who his dad really was, and it hurt his heart.  He said he can still remember today what it felt like.  Sure, my grandparents took the kids to church and seemed like they had it together. However, it was all a show.  My grandpa could only hide so long who he really was at his core.

My point is that we all compartmentalize our lives, and we can only hide so long.  I think that this is going to be conversation that will eventually give me an in into some of these guys lives.  They are walking contradictions.  I don’t mean to be accusatory, we are all walking contradictions at times, but it’s so painfully obvious.  Where are the real men? Where are the real people?  We all just put on the mask that best fits whatever environment we find ourselves in.  I don’t want to live that way.  I think that if I do my best to de-compartmentalize my life, others will see that.  My kids will see that.  My neighbors will see that.  I can go to men’s night out and have a good time without being a completely different person that my kids see, or people at Adullam SW see.

At the core of each of us in an insecure little child.  We’re all afraid that we will be exposed and everyone will know that we’re a fraud.  Well, we don’t have to hide.  Not because we have it together, but because we serve a God that brings life into our dark compartments.  He breaks down all the walls in our hearts, and there doesn’t have to be anymore hiding, any more hidden compartments.  This is my prayer for my life, and my prayer for the men that I’m meeting up here.

Please join with me in prayer for this.  Lori and I have discovered that we don’t necessarily need to create community up here.  There is incredible community already happening in our neighborhood.  We’re just not a part of it yet, we are outsiders.  We can invite people all we want into our lives, but we want to be invited into theirs.  We recognize that we are outsiders, and only time and trust can make us insiders.  Please pray that God would give us favor here, and we would become insiders.

By the way, I’m not posting my blog updates on Facebook anymore because I’m starting to add friends that I’ve met up here, and I don’t want them to read about how I’m trying to find ways to lead them to Jesus.  I want to use this blog right now to communicate what’s happening in our ministry, and how people can be praying for us.

Thanks for all your support!

Well, I thought I’d take a second to update everyone on what’s been happening with us.  Life is starting to get fairly busy, and we’re starting to see some awesome relationships developing.  The whole reason we moved up here was to engage in a new community, and bring God’s Kingdom in tangible ways to Littleton.  We really feel like things are starting to progress.

Adullam SW is going really well, we moved to Sunday mornings on Easter.  We still only gather every other week in order to free our community up to engage those around them who don’t know Jesus.  Denver is such an outdoor driven community, and Sundays are a huge day for activity.  A few weeks back we all gathered at the Denver Zoo and invited people in our lives we’re trying to be intentional with, it was a great time!  We moved our gathering from a restaurant to a community center in downtown Littleton. It’s incredibly affordable, and much more conducive to what we are trying to do.  There is a separate child care area, so parents aren’t so stressed out.  We still have food, and keep the program relatively short so there is plenty of time to hang out with each other.  Please feel free to visit us anytime, we’ve had quite a few people from the Springs come check out what we are doing.

We have three villages now, and hopefully more will be popping up all the time.  Our Village now has three couples in it. We’ve been alternating which house we meet in so we all have a chance to invite our neighbors.  A few weeks ago we had some of our friends in the neighborhood come, and last night we met at another couples house and their neighbors came by.  Next week we’ll be at a different house trying to accomplish the same thing.  We really feel like we’re still trying to earn favor here in Littleton.  The process of building trust is a slow one, but God is good and we can see him moving.

I was able to get a part time job to supplement our income a few months ago.  I’m doing some bookkeeping for a software company up here.  It’s a great opportunity because pretty much all of them are unchurched folks.  This is something that I’ve been praying about for a very long time.  I’ve wanted to be bi-vocational, having a foot in vocational ministry and a foot in the working world.  It’s amazing to see how God has given me what I asked for.  However, I had no idea how painful it would be to arrive here!  It’s only by his strength and guidance that any of this is possible.

We’ve started a men’s group ministry as well.  It’s combination of some things we used to do at Pulpit when I was working there.  It’s going really well, and the guys are starting to understand some fundamentals in a relationship with God, and how we intend to grow Adullam through reproducing ourselves.  The women are also starting to meet and come up with a plan for discipleship and community.

I’m still doing an Open Mic night the first Friday night of every month and it’s going great.  The running club isn’t getting a great turn out so I’m thinking about bagging it soon.  I did get some great connections through it, and a friend of mine I met there is planning on running a half marathon with me in October.

Lori is pretty active in the adoption community up here, and we’ve made some awesome connections there as well. It’s been fun to meet other families that have adopted from Ethiopia.  Lori had been going to play groups with other adoptive moms and connecting.  Overall, it’s pretty amazing to see all the places that we are starting to have influence in just 8 months.

Cory Bragg (the other pastor working with me) and I met with my mentor this week.  He shared a lot of things with us that were very encouraging.  One of those things was about “growing into ministry.”  Often you hear people say; “I’m going into ministry.”  His point is that here is a difference between going into ministry and growing into ministry.  I needed to hear that.  So much of them time we are about having the perfect plan and structure in place before moving forward.  Don’t get me wrong, structures are important in what we are doing.  I do however very much feel like we are “growing into ministry.” It takes so much pressure off to know that it’s okay to not have all the answers.

That being said, I wanted to bring some things to your attention that we need prayer for.  Most importantly, that Lori and I would love our boys and be there for them above anything else.  Kaden heads off to school in August, and we are not looking forward to it!  Pray for our marriage, and personal walks with the Lord.  We want our ministry to pour out of our relationships with the Father.  We also need continued prayer for favor here in Littleton.  We realize it’s a slow process, and we need to have the patience to wait on the Lord.

Our villages are all trying to find places to serve.  We have a couple ideas of where our village might focus, but we need to pray about where God wants us.  Also, we seem to be attracting a lot of young families at ASW.  When we gather we take time out to do lessons with the kids, not just provide babysitting.  However, we seem to be getting more and more and they aren’t getting any younger!  This is another area we are growing into, and need prayer for.

Also, we are always in need of continued financial support.  We’ve got a great support base, but are trusting God to provide others to join our team.  Please pray about coming on board with us however God leads you.  We have people that support us monthly, and others who provide one time gifts.  We can’t do what we are doing without it.  If you’re interested, just email me and I can get you the information.

Cory and I have finally landed on a simple mission statement; “To bring life in bold and creative ways where it doesn’t exist.”  In John 11:10 Jesus said that “I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.”  It’s pretty simple, we want to bring life in Christ to those that have none.

Thanks for being a part of this with us, feel free to come see us anytime!

Keeping fighting the good fight great men and women of God!

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This is one of the most beautiful perspectives I’ve ever seen on suffering.  I saw this video a few years ago, and it deeply impacted me. I hope it has encouraged you…

Today someone I know posted on Facebook that their mood matches the weather.  That how they feel about being a parent is reflected in the overcast gloomy conditions that most of our state is blanketed in today.  Another friend was prepared to say goodbye today to the foster child that’s lived with them for the past year, only to find out they have a few more months before he will go.  Joy and sadness are all wrapped up together for them.  I have too many friends losing the battle in their marriages.  I have a friend that just welcomed a new life into their family a week ago, and friends that have recently lost those they love.

This year has been particularly a difficult one for us as a family.  All of us suffer, and that is what brings us together.  I heard someone recently say that suffering is the thing that ties humanity together, not success or wealth.  We can be happy for someone that has success, but suffering creates an immediate bond to others.  It’s those that I’ve experienced suffering with that I most closely tied to.

We all view suffering through the particular worldview that we have attached ourselves to.  For many of us, we don’t have a concept of what suffering is like for those around the world because we’ve never seen it or experienced it.  That of course doesn’t mean that our suffering doesn’t matter, or that it’s not real.  It just means that we process suffering in the context of how we understand the world.  What is suffering to us in America, is something very different from what most of the world faces.  The amazing part is though…God cares.  He cares for everyone in every situation.  Don’t think for a second that what you are going through isn’t important to God, because it is.

One of the difficult things in our relationship with God is wrapping our minds around suffering.  Some of us were sold a bag of goods, and assumed life in Christ meant life without suffering.  Well, it doesn’t take long to learn that isn’t true.  In Phillipians 3:10 it says “I want to know Christ and the power of his resurrection.”  Unfortunately we stop there a lot of times.  It also says, “and the fellowship of sharing in his sufferings, becoming like him in his death.”  It’s easy to want the power, difficult to want the suffering.

We have got to find away through the fog when we are hurting.  Knowing that we have a God that has experienced every kind of suffering we have is amazing.  This truth is the thing that has held us together over the last year, and especially the past few months.  There is so much hurt all around us, but we are not without hope…

In light of our adoption from Ethiopia, I wanted to share something.  I had the chance to go to a ONE meeting on Saturday. If you’re not familiar with ONE, go to one.org for information.  I mentioned them in an earlier blog about the bracelet I wore while praying and waiting for Kaleb. I highly recommend you become a member of ONE.  It is a chance for us to do something about extreme poverty being faced around the world.

This is a video that they showed the I wanted to share.  Bill and Melinda Gates have a foundation that is doing absolutely incredible things.  Check out this video…

Many of us have heard the term “Missional Church.”  What we are trying to establish here in Littleton is a Missional Church. At times, there is a lot of confusion about what a Missional Church is, and isn’t.  I think this video is a great and simple description of that…

Abide. This is the message I’ve gotten over and over from God the last three years or so. My mentor is the one who started pounding it into my head, and I’m a firm believer in God speaking through people. Honestly I’ve never had someone like him in my life. I don’t want to embarrass him so I won’t mention his name. In fact, he wouldn’t want me to. I’ve never met anyone in my life that that wants less credit for things than him. He is so confident of who he is in Christ, he truly finds his joy and peace in him. It doesn’t matter what accolades or recognition he achieves. To him, to live is Christ and to die is gain. Incredible. I hear a lot of people talk about it, but he lives it. It’s just plain inspiring.

He’s one of those people that I go to and ask advice for a problem and he never tells me what to do. There is guidance involved, but he is so good at letting God give me the answers. He knows that each one of us was created differently, and that God speaks to us in different ways. We seem to always come back to abiding in Christ no matter what our conversation is about. John 15 is always where we land.

I’ve decided recently to try and memorize John 15. I had to memorize Matthew 5 in high school, and honestly I hated every minute of it. I had no idea why I was doing it though. I’m not trying to do this for any other reason than my pursuit to press into Christ, and what it means to truly abide in him. Too often I think that abiding has to do with my effort, and it just doesn’t. I read vs. 4 and it says “abide in me, and I in you” and my immediate response is to try and go out and do something.

Okay, I’m going to abide in him by reading through the Bible in a year, or helping the old lady that lives next door (not that I have). Or maybe it’s trying a fast! Not just a fast, but a 40 day fast! I know, I’ll do my best to not sin at all today. I’ll try to not be so impatient with my boys, or I’ll go the extra mile to help my wife out and make her feel loved. I’ll be there whenever someone needs help, no matter what I’m doing at the moment. I’ll drive across the country to help a family that has lost everything in a flood. I’ll go to Mexico and build a house for someone that is in need. I’ll help a homeless man get off of the streets, or walk along side a brother that is bound by the chains of addiction. Then I’ll be abiding. At least, that’s what I thought.

Turns out I wasn’t abiding, I was just busy. Don’t get me wrong, the above mentioned things are all good things. They just aren’t what it means to abide. I believe with all my heart that God leads us to love others, in fact he talks about later in John 15.  It’s just that they come out of a response to abiding in him, not the other way around. Just like a branch finding life from being connected to the vine. It grows and stretches out not because of it’s own effort, but because it is being brought to life through the vine. Apart from the vine, the branch falls to the ground and withers.

So, what does this mean? It means that I no longer have to try and manage my life so that it’s acceptable to God or anyone else. I never had to, I just thought that I did. God asks us to love one another as he has loved us. Well, in order for us to love someone that way, we have to understand HOW he loves us, and how to truly love him. It’s simple right? Abide.

Actually it’s not so simple. I’ve been trying to figure out how to live it out in my life for 3 years.  Herein lies the problem, I’m been trying to “figure it out.”  I’m starting to understand my role in all of this. My role is to abide in him in everything I do. Whether I’m at church, or at the Broncos game. He is with me. I bring him everywhere. I have made a decision to give my life to him, and he’s now part of everything I do. When I try to manage my life, I’m choosing to be disconnected from him, to “unplug” myself from his vine. God makes it pretty simple, “apart from me you can do nothing.”

We are either living by grace, or living by effort. That’s it, one or the other. Living by grace is abiding in him and the spirit’s work in our lives. Living by effort is trying to manage things on our own.

So, try it out. Try to abide. Try to live by grace. It will be a long hard fought battle, probably for the rest of your life. Our natural reaction is to just put forth more effort. What if you put forth less effort? Do you think God would love you any less? Do you think that he is big enough to manage your life for you?

It’s one thing to KNOW that we are supposed to “abide” in Christ, it’s another thing entirely to actually EXPERIENCE it.  It’s time as Christ followers that we started to experience it.  Let’s live by grace together…

Resurrection: Rob Bell from The Work of Rob Bell on Vimeo.